Save Lando

jury duty came and went without much ado. i was never selected, so i had to settle for sitting in a cramped, overheated melting pot of a room for around nine hours. early on, i was under the impression that were i not selected, i would be returning the following day for more wacky oklahoma county hijinks. not the case, fortunately. there was a few things that chapped me. people who couldn’t read, or follow directions. people who insisted on talking loudly on their cells (mainly the real estate skank three people over. fake tan and bleached hair? what year is it?). and people who went about kissing anyones ass they thought could let them go home early. “keep me as long as you want judge!” yeah right, douchebag.

i was able to eat lunch downtown with Loops for the first time. turns out, she works a building or two away from my imagined prison. ate at some diner, and i was super uncomfy with the sheer amount of people i had to see, let alone deal with. later in the day, i dropped by the Thunder team store and brought home a hat. terribly exciting.

with the reintroduction of some past faces (mentioned in the last post and who strangely enough, i have barely any interest in talking to), a few memories came with them. pretty sure i never wrote about this one before. a long time ago, i was ‘ate up’ over this girl i had met online (i know, shut it). this was back in the early 90’s, when bulletin boards were the only thing going on for lonely kids behind a screen. anyway, long story short, friends and penpals for years. met once, nothing happened, i was crushed. i spent weeks holed up, torturing myself over it. what i did wrong, etc. months later, i found a notebook belonging to my best friend at the time.

in it read alot of things, featuring  “i think i like her, he doesn’t deserve her, he’s just a fat boy”.   i really didn’t know how to react to it. that sort of betrayal wasn’t something i’d ever really dealt with. i’m sure everyone has to deal with things similar in their life. be it with friends or spouses or coworkers. it’s likely why i, anymore, seem to keep friends at an arms length (or further). this person periodically shows up in my life, trying to keep what little friendship is there, then dissapears for a couple of years. normally, i would just shoe them off, and be done with it. this case is a little different in that he has issues, big ones, similar to that of a friend that ended up killing himself a few years back (for those of you that havent archived). so i atlas it, and hope.

nothing really poignant about it, just a moment revisited recently. ah memories. gotta be a pill or something to fix those.and after writing something so personal like that (cliff’s notes or not), i always wonder who’s reading this crap. or who would even want to? i’d love to chalk it all up to catharsis, but really how cathartic will this end up being? sometimes it seems so pointless. bah. maybe i just need some sleep.

i promise more stories of idiocy to come, including the kid at my work that kind of likes being called ‘Frodo’.